Jeremy's Blog

Could Mr Right be white?

2007-08-06T15:28:00.001-04:00

This is an interesting news article on inter-racial relations.

How to tell if your Internet life is taking over

2007-07-31T11:51:00.000-04:00

Finding that you've been kidnapped and tortured in order to give up your username and password to a popular online game.

Bruce vs Chuck

2007-07-21T09:05:00.000-04:00

So, if Bruce Lee were to fight Chuck Norris...who would win?

Find out for yourself.

This scene is from Return of the Dragon

Chuck

2007-07-13T06:40:00.000-04:00

Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.

The leading causes of death in the United States are:
1. Heart Disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 minutes.

For some more interesting facts about Chuck Norris, check out this link.

I need YOU....

2007-07-12T08:22:00.000-04:00

to help classify galaxies.
This project is sort of like the Seti@Home project, except they harness the classification of the human brain. Just plug the electrodes into your skull, get online, and the rest they say is history...
Just kidding.
They put you through a small galaxy classification tutorial, and then they set you loose in helping classify galaxies. Part of the problem is they have millions of galaxies that have their picture taken, and not enough manpower to sort through all the pictures. If you're a science geek, then take a stab at it!

M$ protex me!

2007-07-03T20:43:00.001-04:00

I encountered this error message today:

I'm glad SOMEONE is looking out for my computers well being!

Flight of the Conchords

2007-06-30T09:39:00.000-04:00

These guys are pretty funny

Albi

Hiphopopotamus vs Rhymenoceros (*edit: contains some mild bad language in case kiddies are around)

Jenny

World's Ugliest Dog

2007-06-23T15:24:00.000-04:00

Read all about it here

Zoom It!

2007-06-14T08:52:00.000-04:00

I found this really awesome little program called ZoomIt. If you ever do presentations on your PC, run this little puppy (only 100K or so), and it lets you zoom in on your screen and break into draw mode, so you can draw on your screen with your mouse.
Check it out

Agua de Coco

2007-06-13T22:22:00.000-04:00

Folks,

If you ever get tempted to try some Agua de Coco, or Coconut Water...take some advice from your good buddy Wbobth. DON'T!!!!!

I had been intrigued for weeks by seeing the cans of coconut water on the shelves of the Hispanic section of the supermarket. Finally I gave in to the temptation, and bought myself a can of Coconut Water, which I assume that people actually drink as a beverage for enjoyment.

Some of the main ingredients are:

Young coconut juice

Sugar

Young coconut pulp

Not knowing what to expect, I poured myself a glass.

It looked like when the kids eat some white bread, then decide to take a sip of my water. Or it looks like when you leave milk in a glass too long, let it solidify, then pour hot water on it in an attempt to loosen the congealed milk on the bottom of the glass.
Anyway, strike one for Agua de Coco for looking nasty.
Strike two for Agua de Coco for being horrifically nasty. The kids actually took a sip before I did, but I was not persuaded by the nasty face they made since anything new they try is automatically nasty.
The flavor is not quite coconutty, but like nothing I can describe.
The only thing I can recommend is for you to buy a can of Agua de Coco yourself just after I told you not to.

Computer Maintenance 101

2007-06-06T07:06:00.000-04:00

A few days ago our computer was experience some massive problems. It was experience really bad lock-ups. By a bad lock-up I mean the screen just froze. No mouse. Not CTRL-ALT-DEL. No Blue Screen. The clock even stopped. It would happen between 10 seconds and 5 minutes after the computer started.
At first I feared a virus or worm. Then I feared hard drive failure, or bad RAM. (Of course it has to be the hard drive...I haven't backed up for a few months...)
So I started in safe mode to rule out and bad device drivers. The computer didn't crash after an hour on, but the fan was going like crazy. We have one of those temperature sensitive fans that turns on when it starts to get hot.
Wondering whether or not it was hot, I rebooted into BIOS mode, and went to the section that told me the CPU temperature. Almost 70C (160F). I did a quick search on normal CPU temperatures, and I found the normal range was 30 to 50C.
I shut the computer off, and looked at the CPU fan. I could not see the cooling tower for all the dust.
I took the fan off, got out the vacuum, and vacuumed off the eighth inch carpet of dust from the CPU cooling tower (being careful not to touch any components inside the computer)
The computer has been fine ever since.

You try and tell the young people of today...

2007-05-17T06:50:00.000-04:00

...and they won't believe you!

7 things

2007-05-11T07:17:00.000-04:00

It seems I've been tagged.

So, here goes:
1. I used to live on a street called Garfield Avenue.
2. I happen to really like the Garfield cartoons.
3. We had gerbils, a turtle, fish, a snake, cats, a rabbit, a bullfrog, and an anole for pets when I was growing up. (Not all at once, of course)
4. The rabbit lasted a day because the cats ate it.
5. My pet names are very unoriginal (Boxy, Scales, Jumper and Anole). See if you can guess which animals belong to which names.
6. I vowed to never become a programmer.
7. I'm a programmer.

Now...who to tag next... I don't know 7 people who blog. So, anyone reading this and wants to do this, have at it!

Sticky Situation

2007-05-07T08:41:00.000-04:00

If you ever find yourself in a sticky situation...it's probably not as sticky as this guy's.

Sandwich bags

2007-04-24T22:11:00.000-04:00

I got video editing software for myself. Here is my lousy first attempt.

Wanna win a new puter?

2007-04-24T18:08:00.000-04:00

Have some rusty C++ skills? Have no C++ skills at all?
Great!
Then submit an entry to the OMGWTF programming contest.
Where the goal is to write the bestest worstest code that actually sorta runs.
Winner gets a new puter.

Pancakes

2007-04-18T21:36:00.000-04:00

Tonight I made some pancakes.
First, I followed the normal Bisquick recipe:
2 Cups mix
1 cup milk
2 eggs

I made a few of the pancakes normally (read: for the picky kids).
Then I experimented.
I warmed up half of an apple, skinned and chopped into cubes with a bit of brown sugar to taste in the microwave for 30 seconds.
I had prepared a cup of Tazo Chai in advance, because I was thinking on the way home how I was going to doctor the pancakes. I left it steeping in the bag for 5 - 10 minutes to get it good and strong.
I added half a cup of the strong Chai and the warmed apples to the pancake mixture, and cooked in a well oiled griddle to get the edges nice and crispy.

I topped with butter and syrup, and melted away in a sea of Apple-Chai pancake bliss.

Conspiracy? Nah! Never!

2007-04-18T14:48:00.000-04:00

When I browse Microsoft's documentation website in IE, my page looks like this.

This is what it looks like in Firefox.

Also, you'll notice the different URLs. When I paste the URL into IE, it redirects me to the correct page. In FF, I get no such redirect. Methinks Microsoft doesn't want people reading their website with THAT browser.
Here's the URL if you want to try it yourself.

Watch out Geordi!

2007-04-13T11:58:00.000-04:00

Scientists are working on a visor for the blind that will translate light into brain signals for you.

In other news, scientists have cracked the secret of Photosynthesis. Keep an eye out for green cars...literally. Perhaps in 20 years all we'll have to do is scoop some pond scum into the water tank on top of our cars for fuel.

Android Entertainment

2007-03-28T23:16:00.000-04:00

Commander Data, having been newly outfitted with his human emotion chip, now knows exactly how to give maximum entertainment to the audience.

(OK...I'm obsessing over this Vitas guy. He is just so hilarious in his badness, yet obviously thinks he is the koolest kat on the planet. In this clip, he looks amazingly like Brent Spiner A.K.A. Commander Data without the makeup.)

Michael Jackson move over...

2007-03-26T18:09:00.000-04:00

This guy sings sort of normally until about a third of the way through...
He would make a wailing banshee proud...

R U A L33T H4X0R?

2007-03-24T23:07:00.000-04:00

See how far you get...

http://www.hackerskills.com/

So Artful...So Craftful...

2007-03-23T08:07:00.000-04:00

This is the result of the dye marathon that I videoed the other day.

Ain't she talented?

The next Yo Yo?

2007-03-23T07:16:00.000-04:00

Dyeing in Style

2007-03-20T23:37:00.000-04:00

Here is me harrassing my wife as she tries to dye some fiber. And yes, I got permission (as though I'd need it...)

Snow Fly...Dont' bother me.

2007-03-17T11:14:00.000-04:00

Looks like I'm not the only one surprised by the snow storm yesterday...

Russian Karaoke

2007-02-28T22:38:00.000-05:00

This is my tribute to Vladimir Vysotsky. Find him on the Wikipedia here.
He was a dissenter during the Soviet era, and his rebellious song lyrics drew a large following.
He died at age 42 from liver disease.

Cool Photos

2007-02-28T20:53:00.000-05:00

Photos that did not make the cut to be included in the Windows Vista wallpaper collection.

Apocolyptica

2007-02-28T19:15:00.001-05:00

Gasp!
I'm in awe...

AArrrr! Toast on the High Seas

2007-02-18T06:57:00.000-05:00

Arrr! Get ye grubby paws off me pirate toast!
Read ye here fir more infARRRRmation.
And I hope ye be readin GARRRRRman, or ye not be understandin!

Band

2007-02-01T21:45:00.000-05:00

The Boy officially got promoted to the Advanced Band today. When I was talking to the band director when we first signed up, I expressed concern that the Boy would be bored. Slightly taken aback, the director said that there was only 1 4th grade drummer that he had ever promoted to the advanced band(6th graders).
When the whole band actually got together for the first time, we asked the Boy how it went. He went on to explain that there were 2 trumpets, 2 clarinets, a trombone, and 20 snare drums. We all howled. Apparantly the school district lets the students completely choose what instrument they want, and all the boys signed up for the drum. We were really looking forward to that concert...
The boy was also very frustrated, because he kept losing his place in the music, because NO ONE was playing in time, and it was too much for his brain to handle.
So, the advanced band players have already been playing for a few years now, and can sort of stay together.
I'll have to record the Boy telling this story, because I was rolling on the floor laughing when he described how the director was SHOUTING 1...2...3...4 to try to keep the band together with sheer will power. I think it takes a special kind of person to lead an Elementary band.
I'll keep you posted...

May I take your order?

2007-01-27T11:10:00.000-05:00

One order of the explodescow son.

The lady will be having pig livings bowel, followed by some cowboy meat. Oh, could she get the small or medium bowl?

And for dessert, we'll add a peaceful.

JJA #5 - Basic Training

2007-01-25T22:46:00.000-05:00

Well, I first have to start with one more thing that should have been included in the Reception Post.

My very first Army photo. They take this photo before you even get to basic training, which I find odd, because alot of people drop out, so it should really be a graduation photo. Not only that but some folks lose ALOT of weight in Basic Training, so the picture just becomes a reminder of the pitiful excuse of a human being you were before you got all strong and manly and fit.

Anywho, here it is.

(click to enlarge)
The thing I remember about this morning is that they woke us up around 5 AM, shaved our head, then lined us up for the picture. The other funny thing is that the dress uniform has velcro in the back, so I walked up to the photographer in my jeans (I hadn't even gotten my Army issue clothes at this point), they slapped the uniform over my torso, plopped a hat on my head, and took a snap.
If I recall, I actually tried to smile, because I was feeling grumpy from waking up so early. I guess it didn't help much.

Anyway, on to Basic Training.
In the movies, you see fresh recruits get off a bus, and start to get immediately harrassed by their drill sergeants. I don't remember (big surprise) my first contact. I don't think it was as explosive as the movies, though.
I had the unfortunate displeasure of having 3 drill sergeants. Most of the platoons had just 2, but our class was the last for one drill sergeant, and the first for another. So, to help the new drill sergeant transition in to his new role, they had him in a platoon where one drill sergeant was "retiring".
Being a drill sergeant is a very tough job. They have to be up and perfect when they wake you up at 5 AM, and they are with you until 9 or 10 at night. The standard rotation for a drill sergeant is 2 years. Generally, the Army singles out people it thinks would do well in the position, and asks them to go through the Drill Sergeant school. Yes, there is a school for it. You have the option of refusing, but the refusal goes on your record, and it's not good for your career. Also, drill sergeants get a cool little patch that they can wear on their uniform for the rest of their Army career, so you can readily pick out the people who are or who have ever been a drill sergeant.
Back to BT.
One of the DSs was from Trinidad. This was bad, because no-one could understand his instructions. He would shout something, then we would look at each other in a panic, and start doing just something so we wouldn't look like we weren't trying. Also, it was only several years later that I actually learned the correct words to the cadences he would sing. We just mumbly shouted whatever syllabic approximations we thought he said without actually understanding anything. It was quite humorous.

Anyway, one of the first things they had us do was to learn their names. I remember we were in the barracks, in the "front leaning rest position" (that is basically the up position of a push up, except you just stay there not doing push ups) trying to shout their names in unison. Now, we couldn't all see each other, because there was a row of lockers in the middle of the barracks bay, so we just had to coordinate and eventually say their names in unison, loudly. I don't remember how long it took for us to get it. This was just the first of the mental torture devices they imposed on us.

More next time.

PS
Before you ask...no, its not done yet.

The light at the end of the tunnel

2007-01-15T01:13:00.000-05:00

The painting is finally done. All of the cleanup is done as well. The living room has its final set of furniture. Now all that's left is to reorganize everything that we dumped on the dining room table to clear out the living room. That and hooking up the TV. I hope I remember how, because it was quite complicated. Well, at least we can sit on our couch in the living room, that the table is clear enough for the the kids to have breakfast. Time for these paint spackled hands to go to bed. And yes, its really 1:15 Monday morning.
Yawn.

The mice again...

2007-01-07T21:43:00.000-05:00

No, this isn't about our cute mouse, its about our pesky mice.
After my last round with the mice, I still heard scritching.
I set traps, and I set out the big glue boards, but the mice were too smart for me. I heard scritching without seeing dead mice in my traps.
Just this past weekend, I bought glue trays (as opposed to boards) with some mouse bait already in them. The bait were these little seed looking things.
I caught 4 mice in 2 days.
I haven't heard anymore scritching.

Ikea

2007-01-06T22:09:00.000-05:00

I know, the Mrs already blogged about it, but I have to give my take. I was totally impressed with the whole shopping experience. I can't believe I am going to say this, but when I walked in, I actually WANTED to buy furniture!
They had happy music playing.
We could check our kids into the playland so we could shop unhindered.
They had little pencils, paper, and tear-off rulers everywhere so that you could write down what you wanted.
They had pre-done demo rooms that you could walk through, and see how an all Ikea room would look.
And my favorite part...food. I didn't get the name "Chow Boy" in the Army for nothing. I really like my food.
They had a little cafe where you could get some Swedish meatballs with gravy and Lingonberry sauce. They had a store where you can take home a taste of Sweden.
It was their attention to detail not only in the shopping experience that impressed me so much, but it was also the attention to detail in putting the furniture together.
Everything fit. Perfectly.
No wiggling or jiggling. It just fit together like it was supposed to.
So, we are definitely going back.
The only thing I found mildly unsettling was keeping the Swedish names for everything.
So I found myself talking about Billy and Tromsö and Malm.
Whew! I think that should catch me up on blogging!
P.S.
I know two Swedish tongue twisters. I met a girl from Sweden, and she taught me two of them. I have this habit of forcing foreigners to teach me a tongue twister in their language. Perhaps that will be the subject of a future blog post...

Walk like a dolphin

2007-01-06T22:06:00.000-05:00

Go here to buy one for yourself. I think they will only set you back 80 grand.

Tree Goats

2007-01-06T22:04:00.000-05:00

These guys are for real (that is, not photoshopped). I guess there were no mountains around to climb.

If you...

2007-01-06T11:49:00.000-05:00

If you give a woman an entertainment center, she'll want to get rid of the bookcase that the TV is sitting on.
If she gets rid of the bookcase, she'll want to buy new bookcases to put the books on.
If she buys new bookcases, then she'll want to reorganize the whole living room.
If she reorganizes the living room, she'll want to get rid of another couch, and the other bookcase.
If she gets rid of the bookcase and couch the living room, there is no longer space to hide art supplies behind.
If she needs a place to put her art supplies, she'll want to reorganize her art room.
If she reorganizes her art room, she needs to move an old desk and give it to The Boy.
If she gives the desk to The Boy, she needs to buy a loft bed, and a larger dresser, and bookshelves.
If she buys furniture for The Boy, she needs to clean the basement to put some of his old furniture.
If she cleans the basement, she needs to move the drum set.
While cleaning the basement, she finds some paint to repaint the living room.
If she paints the living room, she'll want to take down the old brown paneling cleverly disguised as a blue wall.
If she takes down the brown paneling, she'll want drywall to cover up the crappy plaster wall that the brown paneling was diguising in the first place.
If she needs to drywall the wall, she'll need to move the piano.
If she moves the piano, then she can move the couch.
If she moves the couch, then she can paint the new entertainment center.
If she paints the entertainment center, then she can put the TV on it.

And you wonder why I havent blogged on my vacation :)
(Credit goes to Laura Numeroff for the "If you give a" line.)

Merry Christmas!

2006-12-25T13:35:00.000-05:00

If you didn't get anything you liked today, here is a game to alleviate your boredom.

My Mouse

2006-12-20T07:37:00.000-05:00

My middle daughter was in the Nutcracker this past weekend. She had a blast.

In the end, we had one tired mouse...

Geography Quiz

2006-12-18T13:30:00.000-05:00

Take a geography quiz, and see if you can beat my score.

BTW, this is the first time I took this. If you take it again, the states are given in random order.

HINT: when you are wrong, it shows you in red where the state should be. Drag the state into the red area to proceed to the next state.

Kids say the darndest things

2006-12-15T15:02:00.000-05:00

Some kids (ages 10 to 13) were exposed to the video games we played as youth, and their reactions were recorded.
It's pretty funny, especially the one where the kid complains that Tetris is too boring, cause the blocks don't explode. Here's the link.

R U Racist?

2006-12-14T22:57:00.000-05:00

The story that this article accompanied was saying that unconscious or implicit racism was still rampant in the US.
Here's a test to see if you are unconsciously racist.
https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/demo/selectatest.jsp
Then choose the "Race IAT"
After some of you post your results, I'll tell you what it said about me.

THE SCREAM

2006-12-13T17:02:00.000-05:00

I'm sure you've seen Mrs. Wbobth's final animation project by now. If you haven't, here's the link. Anyway, I was in charge of doing the sound for the project (yes, the world map AND the Sherlock Holmes papers are MORE than paid off) and I needed a crowd screaming when they encountered the hot dog. So, I recorded everyone in the family screaming. I used this awesome free sound editing software called Audacity to do all the mixing and fading. Anyhow, Wiffle (my sister) and the author of the hot dog story came over one night, and I displayed what I had so far, and I was explaining that I needed some more screams. So, Mr. E took his best stab at a scream, and scared the living crap out of me and my sister. We were NOT expecting what we heard. Anyhow, here's a link to THE SCREAM.

Peter Boyle, R.I.P.

2006-12-13T13:37:00.000-05:00

Peter Boyle is dead at age 71.
He was the guy who played the father on Everyone Loves Raymond.
The other notable part he played was the monster in Mel Brooks' 1974 classic film Young Frankenstein.
If you've never seen this movie, it is a must see. I nearly peed my pants laughing when Dr. Frankenstein and his monster creation did a song and dance number and the monster shouts "Puttin' on the Ritz!"

3 Million?

2006-12-13T08:18:00.000-05:00

3 Million bees removed from couples' apartment.

I uninstalled IE7

2006-12-09T13:35:00.000-05:00

Actually, I used the System Restore utility to take my system back to the day before I installed IE7 just to make sure it REALLY got it.
It broke our Movie Maker which was pretty much a deal breaker, since we have been using it so much. If I really want tabs, I'll go with Firefox.

Howly crapolla

2006-12-07T13:39:00.000-05:00

I can't believe someone can actually do this.
Wonder how many broken bones the guy got learning how to do this.

You know you're a redneck when...

2006-12-06T15:57:00.000-05:00

Your bike has been in your front yard for so long that the tree is hugging it.

Macromedia killer?

2006-12-06T10:29:00.000-05:00

Looks like Micro$oft is working the the Macromedia Dreamweaver suite replacement.
It's called Expression Studio.
http://www.microsoft.com/products/expression/en/expression-studio/default.mspx
It has a web designer (similar to Dreamweaver), something that looks like it can do what Flash does, and a graphic designer programer similar to Fireworks or Freehand.
'Twill be interesting to see if it takes off.

He Shoots!

2006-12-05T08:46:00.000-05:00

He Scores!

Internet Explorer 7

2006-12-03T20:52:00.000-05:00

I installed IE7 on our main home computer just to check it out.
It features a redesigned interface, tabbed browsing like Firefox, an RSS feed button so you can monitor all your favorite blogs.
The only thing bad so far is somehow it broke our Windows Movie Maker.
Here's a screenshot.

(click to enlarge)

Some cool videos

2006-12-03T20:19:00.000-05:00

Amazing ping pong...the guy does a somersault and still gets the ball.

Bottle music

Worlds best beatboxer

OK...I'm a geek

2006-12-02T16:37:00.000-05:00

I like Fractals. I like them so much that I wrote a program to generate Fractal images with the ability to change the color scheme and animate them.

This is the same fractal image with 3 different color schemes applied.

Blue bug.

Cool Yellow.

Ugh. Headache...

The same fractal zoomed in.

and here's an animation.

Nuclear Holocaust

2006-12-01T11:12:00.000-05:00

After all the atomic bombs have finished falling, the only thing that will be left on Earth are ants, cockroaches, and statues of Ronald McDonald asking us if we're lovin' it .

Perks of being the Emperor of the Galaxy

2006-11-28T22:26:00.000-05:00

Great view.

Fantastic Dental.

All the lightning you want.

And your very own bottomless pit right in the middle of your office.

Funny Anecdote

2006-11-27T12:48:00.000-05:00

How true this is...

A man in a hot air balloon is lost. He sees a man on the ground and reduces height to speak to him.
"Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
"You're in a hot air balloon hovering thirty feet above this field," comes the reply.
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do," says the man, "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "Everything you told me is technically correct, but it's no use to anyone."
"You must be in business," says the man.
"I am," says the balloonist, "How did you know?"
"Well," says the man, "You don't know where you are, you don't know where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault."

JJA #4 - Reception

2006-11-23T11:04:00.000-05:00

From Harrisburg, they flew me to Fort Jackson, South Carolina for Basic Training. Now, in the movies, they show recruits arriving only to immediately encounter their screaming drill sergeant immediately. Well, in reality, they have to do some housekeeping before you can meet your drill sergeants.

This is called Reception.

I think I spent a total of 3 or 4 days in Reception.

They had us spent alot of time on "the mat".

They would have us wait here between the different stations that we needed to visit.

Some of the things they had us do here was get a haircut.

And yes, they actually made us pay $4 for it. The barbers were so fast that they cut one guys forehead while moving the shaver towards his head.

They also gave us all of our immunizations here. This was a very interesting experience. They used no needles for the shots. They had these hydraulic pressure guns that squirted the medicine in a high-pressure stream so that it would pierce your skin. They warned us not to flinch while getting the shots, otherwise we would have a gash in our arm. I got 3 shots in one arm, and 2 in the other. I saw some of the other guys flinch...

Then came the best shot. I think they stored this thing in the refrigerator, because the medicine was VERY cold. It was also so thick that it took 30 seconds to get it all in you. And they gave it to you in your butt.

Here was where we had to relinquish our civilian clothes and go all military. They took away everything that you brought with you, except your toiletry bag. They gave us new everything down to brown Army underwear that didn't quite fit, and horrible itchy hot green wool socks.

The elastic band of the underwear was so unelastic that a week into basic training it had cut into my sides so I had perpetual raw skin around my waist.

Here's a photo of the clothes line.

The boots also did not fit very well.

During the course of Basic Training, I got blisters on my feet. Then I got blisters on top of my blisters. Then I got blisters on top of those. To this day, I have large pads of skin on my toes where I got those blisters that were not there before the Army.

The guys who wore glasses had to give up their civilian glasses, and get Army issue glasses. We called them BCGs, or Birth Control Glasses. They made you so ugly that, well, you get the idea.

One other memorable experience from my time in Reception was the acclimatization process. There was record heat that summer in South Carolina, and right before I arrived, someone on post had died from heat stroke.
So they made us drink, and drink, and drink more water. 1 quart per hour if I recall correctly. I never peed so much in my life. They made us drink so much that one guy puked water all over the floor in front of me. No chunks, just water.

Next stop - Basic Training!

Google Targeted Ads

2006-11-22T15:42:00.000-05:00

I love my G-Mail. Don't know what I would do without it.

However, today I got an invitation to a Christmas Party. Actually the verbage was "Annual Holiday Luncheon." So, what does Google think I would be interested in?

My Day Off

2006-11-21T11:57:00.000-05:00

I took the day off so I could watch the kids while the Mrs. was taking a spinning class. She went with her friend who is teaching her how to spin raw wool into yarn.
I figured I would use the day to get some some much needed chores done. I woke up around 6-ish to help the Mrs get her grandmother's old spinning wheel into the van so she could use it for her class.
After the girls got up, I decided that we would make some Chicken corn soup together. I set the girls to shredding carrots in our Pampered Chef cheese grater(works wonderfully!), while I chopped onion and prepared the rest of the ingredients. The girls were thrilled. They really like cooking with Daddy.

Afterwards, I went to buy some tires. I made this decision last week while hydroplaning down the road during the rainstorm we had.
So, I go to the tire place, and while I'm waiting the hour or so for the car to be done, the kids and I walk over to the used video game store to browse around. The boy has been saving up work dollars towards a new video game, so he cashed those in.
After that, we walked down to the fabric store to let the girls peruse around. I am always amazed at what girls get excited over. They were both oohing and aahing over the different fabrics, how pretty they were, how they would like to make jammies out of this fabric, or how cute the hearts were on another fabric while The Boy was hollering about how bored he was. I reminded him that the girls were bored in the video game store.
We also went to Kmart, and looked through the girls clothes rack, and the toy aisle.
Cell phone rang. Car's done. 350 smackeroos. Back to home. Car feels wonderful. I must've needed tires for a while.
This is turning out to be an expensive day.
In the evening, we had parent teacher conferences. The Mrs had not yet made it back from her class, so I went to meet the teachers.
Middle girl's conference was first. She is doing fantastic. A few problems with counting money, but nothing that can't be helped with a little practice. It was a very short conference. "You're daughter's perfect. Any questions?" :)
Then I get to The Boy's conference.
Academically, everything is stellar. Behavior-wise, well...you know. Read Mrs. Wbobth's blog to read the history of The Boy. He is having crying sessions in class when given writing assignments because he doesn't know what to write. I can't be too hard on him, because I also hated those free form writing assignments that the teachers gave. On the other hand I don't think writing about your favorite Thanksgiving food should be a crying matter...
I didn't manage to get to what I really wanted to do, which was clean the basement.
Now I need to rest from my day off...

Take the "A" Train

2006-11-14T22:00:00.000-05:00

The boy is learning Swing drumming.
Here is his progression of a new beat over 3 days of practice.
I'm impressed.

$160,000 fungus

2006-11-14T09:11:00.000-05:00

A truffle was recently auctioned off for about 160 grand. I can't imagine paying that much for some fungus.
But you know what they say. Once you've tasted it once, it grows on you...

Fighting Army Style #4 - Caption Competition

2006-11-11T16:49:00.000-05:00

OK, blogosphere! I need YOU to come up with a good caption for this one.

A couple of my ideas:
1. Soldiers outfitted with Depends for when they crap their pants in battle.
2. Brave soldier given task of cleaning Cyclops ear with specially designed Q-Tip.
3. Here's the body armor our troops should be using.

The future of photos?

2006-11-10T08:51:00.000-05:00

Here's a link to something called Photosynth, put out by Microsoft.
It's in pre-beta stage right now, but what it basically does is scan through your photos looking for similarities, and extrapolates a 3D montage allowing you to "walk" through your photos.

They also recommend 1 Gig of RAM to run the demo.

Seems interesting...we'll see where it goes.

My awesome wife

2006-11-08T18:55:00.000-05:00

She is taking this animation class which is taught in Flash.
Here is her latest project. (I helped out with the Russian and the globe)

Election Selection 06

2006-11-06T20:51:00.000-05:00

Forget those pompous political pundits on TV.
Wbobth has everything you need to make an informed selection this election season.
All you need are the signs you see along the highway.

Can't...walk...any...more...

2006-11-05T23:37:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the parents vs. kids soccer game. I may have mentioned before that I am extremely unathletic. Of the 7 parents that were on the team, 5 were soccer coaches, 1 evidently was a soccer star back in Scotland in his youth...and then there was me. I think this was the first full soccer game I ever played in my life. So I let the other guys do stuff like try to get the ball into the goal. I hung back and played defense. My only strategy was to run as fast as the kid and get in the way of them getting a clear shot on the goal. This strategy worked pretty well until I realized that I could only sprint once every 5 minutes or so. By the end of the hour, I was so tired that a 5 yr old dribbling the ball towards me got past me, and I couldn't catch up.
So this morning I got up, and I let out a howl as pain shot through my body as I went to put my pants on. Everything is painful...getting in and out of the car, climbing stairs, watching TV...
Anyway, I did have fun. The boy had a blast. And I'm getting used to the taste of Advil.
Oh, yeah...the kids won.

Animation Idea

2006-11-03T13:41:00.000-05:00

Mrs. Wbobth is doing a project for her animation class that she is taking this semester. The instructions stated that she needed to animate a(n) historical event. After much thought, she decided to do an animation of the Alexei Leonov performing the first space walk.

Too bad she didn't decide to do Laika, the first dog in space.

Windows Trivia

2006-11-02T08:50:00.000-05:00

Over on the right I have a link to "The Old New Thing" which is a blog maintained by a guy who has been on the Windows programming team from I think the Windows 3.x days. Anyway, here is an interesting set of links I gleaned out of his archives of useless Windows trivia and interesting anecdotes.

Why are there 2 copies of Notepad?

Why is the registry called a hive?

Why does Windows 95 have functions called BEAR, BUNNY and PIGLET?

I'll take one of everything

Twenty foot long computer

Do not underestimate the power of the game Deer Hunter

Actual Death Threat

An insight into the Windows 95 startup sound

What is this Xerox directory doing in Program Files?

Windows Annoyances - Useless dialog boxes

2006-11-01T15:13:00.000-05:00

Whenever you try to open a file that does not have a program associated with the extension of the file, this dialog pops up.

The default option is to "Use the Web Service" to help you out. Has anyone ever actually used this Web Service? Well, today was my lucky day. I wanted to find out what would happen.

When I hit OK, it directed me to this web page:

Now, this is telling me "I have no clue what your file is." No duh, you told me that on the other dialog box. Now, look at the options that this gives me.
It's telling me to go to yet another website, which (I'm sure) will still not tell me what to do with my stinkin' file.
Better yet, one of the suggestions is "UK Technical support".
HUH??!?!
If I were a novice user, and I were presented with this page, I would be more confused than ever.

In general, the only program I use to open unrecognized file types is Notepad.
I'm sure there is no way to set that as my default, and Microsoft forces me to go through a completely meaningless step to do what I want to.

Those crazy Russians

2006-10-31T09:26:00.000-05:00

You know your winters are too long when ice bathing is a national pasttime.

Death by butt

2006-10-30T14:18:00.000-05:00

This chick is dead due to having one too many butts. Read about it here.

Reminds me of our 6 toed cat that couldn't climb trees. We named him "Fweek". I remember one time Fweek got freaked out, and instinctively went to climb a tree, and landed on his back.

Good riddance?!?

2006-10-30T09:29:00.000-05:00

Some of you may have been shocked and dismayed by my callous attitude over the demise of an unfortunate pigeon in the gullet of a pelican.
Although this story probably belongs in the JJA series, I will enlighten you as to where this desire to see all pigeons suffer comes from.

It happened while I was at the Defense Language Institute in Monterey, California. The barracks we stayed in were quite lovely. The barracks buildings had Spanish tile on the roof, there were two person rooms, each with its own bathroom, a common area on each floor with lounge furniture, and each floor had a small balcony so you could stand outside if you wished.
Being the Army, cleanliness of everything and especially maintainance of the facilities took a very high precedence. We all had responsibilities to keep the grounds neat and clean.
One day, we were cleaning, and we notice that a pigeon had built a nest on our balcony. As I go to shoo the pigeon away, and get rid of the nest, Specialist G (who shall be known just as Specialist G to protect the innocent) rushed up and demanded to know what I was doing.
First, a few words about Specialist G.
She was one of the few people who had been at DLI forever. She was a student, but she had gotten through some portion of the language class, contracted some illness that made her unable to attend class, so she just kind of hung around not really doing much...other than try to save pigeons.
I replied to Specialist G that I was shooing the pigeon away because it was messing up our balcony. She was so adamant that the pigeon should stay, that she went to our platoon sergeant with the case for why the pigeon should stay on our balcony. AND HE AGREED WITH HER!!!
Now, this is the Army. The Army that trains its soldiers to kill people. And the Army that has mascot pigeons roosting on the balconies of its barracks.
So we watched the pigeon lay its eggs, and nurture its young. And poop. And poop some more. And poop and poop and poop. By the time the pigeon raised it young, and abandoned its nest in search of another balcony to poop on, our balcony looked like a winter wonderland.
And who ended up cleaning up the entire balcony by himself????
Private Mitchell. Not Specialist G.
I hate pigeons.

Fighting Army Style #3

2006-10-28T12:47:00.000-04:00

Kick em in the uh-uh!

1. While your opponent is flying in the towards you with his awesome HIIIYAAA flying side kick, calmly catch his foot.
2. Kick him in the uh-uh.

1. Stand in your stupid side guard position.
2. While your opponent is staring off into space, telegraph your intentions with a really big windup.
3. Hopefully your opponent does not notice the trajectory of your foot going towards...
4. Kick him in the uh-uh.
5. Laugh and gloat as your opponent doubles over in pain. Good job soldier.

1. While your opponent is standing in the stupidest position possible with a bayonet pointed at YOUR uh-uh...
2. Single handedly grab his rifle while he does nothing to prevent it.
3. Continue to stand there with one hand on your opponents rifle confident that he cannot get away from your steely grip. Laugh to yourself knowing what you are about to do.
4. Kick him in the uh-uh.
5. While your opponent is stunned, go for the ultra-deadly kick to the knee.

Mr. Pelican has a snack

2006-10-27T15:53:00.000-04:00

Click here to read the description of the pigeon struggling to get away from the pelican.
Good riddance...

All I want for Christmas...

2006-10-26T01:16:00.000-04:00

So, the girls decided to start writing their Christmas list already. The older one is taking dictation from the younger one, since the younger one can't write. So, this is what I found laying on the dining room table this evening. Perhaps I won't get them EVERYTHING they want on their list...

Like Father, LIke Son

2006-10-25T20:00:00.000-04:00

So I get home from work today, go into the kitchen, and there is a dead mouse in a trap near the dishwasher. Of course, the kids need to see, so I holler upstairs for everyone to come see the dead mouse. Middle daughter exclaims "Ooooh, you got another one daddy!!!" Then, when I thought about it, I didn't remember setting a trap there. That is when son pipes up and says "I set the trap today. I baited it with crumbs from the toaster oven." Aaaaaaah, That's my boy!!!

Mouse Hunter Extraordinaire Jr.

Mouse Hunter Extraordinaire

2006-10-23T23:09:00.000-04:00

Since the weather became colder, we have had some unwelcome guests in our house...mice. We first discovered them because we have a drop ceiling in our kitchen (thanks to the previous owners) and I heard them skritching along above the ceiling tiles one evening squeaking all the way. Blecchhhhh. So when I get a chance i pick up some mouse hunting supplies at the local hardware store. I put peanut butter on some traps and place it by the spots that I suspect the mice are getting into our kitchen. The first night I caught 1 mouse. That was good. It was a dumb mouse and fell for the peanut butter trick right away. However, we had (at least) one other mouse that has eluded capture. I tried glue boards, I tried the peanut butter trick...the kids even suggested that I put bread on the traps since they seem to like that as well. I even tried to put a trap in the ceiling tiles, but there is not enough space between the ceiling tile and the ceiling to let the trap spring.
The mouses luck ran out....TONIGHT!!!! HAAAHAHAHHAAA!

I was sitting in the quiet evening house when I thought I heard pans rattling under the stove.
Oh No, I thought...its living under the stove in our pots!!! BLEEEEEECH!

So I run over to the stove, and pull out the thing under the stove. Nothing.
I move some pots around, and I see the mouse running frantically away. In its panic it couldn't jump high enough to get out of the box. Perhaps it use the pots to get up before, because at this point I had most of the pots out of the thingy. So, hoping it would not jump out, I ran and grabbed one of my set traps with PB on it, and placed it in the stove compartment where the mouse was. When mice aren't stressed, they can avoid the traps, but when they panic, they tend to ignore caution. So I got the broom, and started stabbing at the mouse to make it run around. Sure enough, after 30 seconds, it stepped on the trap. As it took its last breath, I tossed it in the trash can...
Trash day is tomorrow.

P.S. Now I'm washing every pan under our stove.

TV of the Future

2006-10-23T09:15:00.000-04:00

Expendability

2006-10-21T23:02:00.000-04:00

Communism works

2006-10-20T08:04:00.000-04:00

Satellite view of the Korean Peninsula at night. The big splotch below the line is Seoul. The little dot above the line is N. Korea's capital, Pyonyang. No doubt the lights in the North are the amusement park on the Dear Leader's compound...

Bloatware?

2006-10-19T12:17:00.000-04:00

Windows Vista, the next Operating System from Microsoft will require a whopping 15 GB of free hard drive space to install. Here's a nice little graph of space requirements for various versions of Windows.

Raw Data (I'm not sure what is causing the extra space...apologies):

Win 95	55 MB
Win NT	110 MB
Win 2000	650 MB
Win XP	1500 MB
2003 server	2500 MB
Windows Vista	15000 MB

Yummy cookies

2006-10-17T19:21:00.000-04:00

Mrs. Wbobth brought home some cookies today. I'm excited!!!

JJA #3 - Shipping out

2006-10-16T20:41:00.000-04:00

Well, the long year wait was over, and all I needed to do was go. From what I recall, the recruiter gave me a report date, but it was actually before my high school graduation. I think my mom called to complain, and my report date magically moved to 3 days after graduation. June 21, 1993. I reported to the local high school bright and early and the recruiters drove us to Harrisburg for stage 1 of our inprocessing. 2 notable events happened while I was at Harrisburg: the big lie that I mentioned in a previous story, and the physical.

The Big Lie
I had already signed my enlistment papers a year prior. However, when I got to Harrisburg, they told me that my job required a 5 year enlistment. So, they ripped up my 4 year commitment paper, and had me sign a 5 year commitment. I was too naive/lazy to protest so I went with it. In hindsight I should have protested. When I got to language school NOONE had a 5 year enlistment. I was the only one.

The Physical
This was actually quite a funny experience. Imagine 60 guys in their underwear duckwalking around a big room. Part of the physical was making sure that everyone had a full range of motion in all of their limbs and joints. They had us do other weird things like hold our hands out and flick our fingers. I don't know how the Army was in the years past, but at least they didn't make us do the "turn your head and cough" in front of everyone else there. So they called us one by one into the doctors office for the more personal exam. The doctor was a small oriental man who had an accent. After examining the front parts, he needed to look in the trunk, so he said the phrase I will remember for the rest of my life: "BENN OHVAH AN SUPWHEDD YAWW TSEEEK". I winced expecting a finger, but thankfully none came (that happened later in my Army career and will be the subject of a future blog post).

After Harrisburg, they flew us to Basic Training.
Next stop: Arrival at Ft. Jackson.
Stay tuned!

Mmmm....Haggis

2006-10-16T11:13:00.000-04:00

Thank the folks over at the Deep End Dining blog for this recipe.

HAGGIS
* 1 sheep's lung (illegal in the U.S.; may be omitted if not available)
* 1 sheep's stomach
* 1 sheep heart
* 1 sheep liver
* 1/2 lb fresh suet (kidney leaf fat is preferred)
* 3/4 cup oatmeal (the ground type, NOT the Quaker Oats type!)
* 3 onions, finely chopped
* 1 teaspoon salt
* 1 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
* 1/2 teaspoon cayenne
* 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
* 3/4 cup stock
Wash lungs and stomach well, rub with salt and rinse. Remove membranes and excess fat. Soak in cold salted water for several hours.
Turn stomach inside out for stuffing.

Cover heart and liver with cold water. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, cover and simmer for 30 minutes.
Chop heart and coarsely grate liver.
Toast oatmeal in a skillet on top of the stove, stirring frequently, until golden.
Combine all ingredients and mix well.
Loosely pack mixture into stomach, about two-thirds full.
Remember, oatmeal expands in cooking.

Press any air out of stomach and truss securely. Put into boiling water to cover. Simmer for 3 hours, uncovered, adding more water as needed to maintain water level.
Prick stomach several times with a sharp needle when it begins to swell; this keeps the bag from bursting.
Place on a hot platter, removing trussing strings. Serve with a spoon.
Ceremoniously served with "neeps, tatties and nips" -- mashed turnips, mashed potatoes, nips of whiskey.
....
Yeah, you'd need to whiskey to keep from passing out when you ate it.
Also, check out the stinky tofu review. Its worth the read.

I'm famous too

2006-10-14T22:07:00.000-04:00

This post is in response to Wbobth's Moms blog entry that she is famous. Well, I just have to prove that I am well known on the Internet too. She might have a video, but I have this.
(BTW, I have nooooooo idea how this got there. I must have uploaded this to a BBS when I was 14 or something.)

Fighting Army Style - #2

2006-10-14T09:45:00.000-04:00

First, we need to continue to learn how to stand before we go on to more advanced moves.

Right and Left Guard.
(BTW, you can click on the pictures to get the full sized view)

This text is taken verbatim from the manual:

Football Kick
a. Objective and use. The object of the football kick is to deliver a powerful kick to a vulnerable area anywhere on the body. It is used best when the opponent is on the ground but not close enough or in the correct position for a heel stomp. (Heel stomp described below.)
b. Description.
To deliver the football kick step close to your opponent, facing him.[ed. best not done backwards]
Plant your non-kicking foot firmly so you can maintain your balance.
When you kick with the other foot swing it to the rear and bend the knee. As you swing the kicking foot forward from the hip, straighten your knee and keep the foot close to the ground. The toe is pointed toward your opponent for maximum force.
Snap the leg forward as if kicking a football.

Heel Stomp
Objective and Use.
The purpose of the heel stomp is to dull the opponent's senses by a blow to the head or other vital area. This stomp is used best when the opponent is lying on the ground.
[ed. Who woulda thunk it? The Army is telling us to kick them while they are down.]
Description.
To execute the stomp you must be standing over the portion of the body you wish to stomp. Pull the knee up and flex the ankle as much as possible. To stomp, straighten out the knee forcefully, striking your opponent with the back edge of the boot. Attempt to drive your heel into the ground to insure that the full force of the kick is delivered to your oppnent.

In the full sized pitcures, notice the little ouch marks they put on the guys face.
Thats all for now!

Football?

2006-10-12T22:48:00.000-04:00

Yes, I played football.
Yes, you may laugh.
(That's my cousin Gary, BTW)

12 step program

2006-10-11T15:04:00.000-04:00

My name is Jeremy...and I'm a programmer.
OK, so this isn't quite Programmers Anonymous, but here are the 12 steps to writing better code.

Eyebrows

2006-10-10T21:11:00.000-04:00

Ah, we have a fascination with eyebrows don't we?
OK, "we" don't, but perhaps I do.
Women spend money plucking and trimming them for having too much hair above the eye is considered unsightly.
Words like unibrow and monobrow have crept their way into our lingo. Even Merriam Webster recognizes unibrow as an official word.
We even have websites mocking those with the genetic code unfortunate enough to produce too much hair where it is not wanted.
However, copious amounts of hair on the brow is not such a stigma in all cultures.
Famous female Mexican painter Frida Kahlo accentuated what must have been her favorite feature in her self portraits.

To the Chinese, having long eyebrows is a sign of age and wisdom, not to mention fighting prowess.

And, whenever we think of the burly Russian man, we picture a big hairy guy with massive eyebrows.
There is the former Soviet premier Leonid Brezhnev...

..to the Cosmonaut Salizhan Sharipov who made the "Famous people with Unibrows list" on Wikipedia.

...and finally the reclusive Russian mathematician who recently won an award for some solving a supposedly unsolvable math problem, Grigory Perelman.

On the bright side, he could be a stand-in for Vorvon the Space Vampire...

I know the date of my demise

2006-10-10T11:29:00.000-04:00

This morning I found a second gray hair. I was mock weeping in the bathroom when my middle child wandered by and asked what was wrong.
"I'm getting old! I have 2 gray hairs!" I sobbed.
"Don't worry" she replied. "You still have 30 years to live."

October 10, 2036
R.I.P.

JJA #2 - Recruitment

2006-10-09T19:46:00.000-04:00

Recruiters are so notorious for lying that one line in a popular Army cadence goes:

My recruiter told me a lie
Join the Airborne and learn to fly

(for the unaware, the Airborne corps is composed of people who jump out of airplanes, which, technically speaking, is controlled flying)
My recruiter actually didn't lie to me too badly. It was only after I signed the papers that the big lie came, but I will get to that in a later post.

Anyway, I was the one that approached the recruiter. I chose the Army, or rather fate chose the Army for me, because it was a toss up between Army and Airforce, and the Airforce recruiter was out to lunch, so I talked to the Army recruiter. The rest is history. BTW, I had ruled out the Marines, cause I thought they were all nuts, and the Navy was out of the question for 2 reasons: they have a rank named after a bodily fluid, and their uniforms look stupid.
So, the Army it was.
I had one simple demand: I wanted to be a linguist.
Well, they said, not so fast. I needed to pass a couple of tests first.
The first test was the ASVAB. Kind of a general knowledge test. If you kept your eyes open for maybe one day in your high school career, you could pass this test, but there were some who tried to join along with me that had to "study up" cause they had failed it once or twice before and they REALLY wanted to join.
Anyway, having passed that with flying colors, I then had to take the DLAB: Defense Language Aptitude Battery. It supposedly measured your potential for learning a language. All I remember is that I scored a 112. Out of what I do not know, but it was high enough for them to accept me. This test was very difficult, probably more difficult than the SAT, although I took the SAT and DLAB about 6 years apart, so it is hard to really compare.
Well, with the tests under my belt, I was assigned the job code of 98G. You can look at this list to see all the job codes and descriptions that the Army has. My official title was Electronic Warfare Specialist or something like that.
All of this occurred the summer between my Junior and Senior year of high school. Now all I had to was graduate High school, and ship off once I graduated.

Next stop: Shipping off for Basic Training.
Stay tuned!

Fighting Army Style - #1

2006-10-08T15:34:00.000-04:00

We shall learn how fight - Army Style!!
When I was still in the Army, our unit was doing some house cleaning, and we came across an old manual on fighting dated from 1971.

The pictures and descriptions are rather humorous, so I will share the hilarity with everyone.

First, we need to learn to stand correctly.
Here is the Front Guard position.

If I stood like this is a real fight, I would get my butt kicked.

Foam Jigsaw

2006-10-07T00:38:00.000-04:00

Well, after being in this house for around 5 yrs (wow has it been that long? We moved in November of 2001 if I recall correctly), I finally decided to take the butt ugly 70's style brown paneling out of our hallway. I feared what I would find behind the paneling, since people put up paneling to hide problems that they don't want to fix. I never expected to find...a foam jigsaw puzzle.
A foam puzzle behind butt ugly 70's style brown paneling?!?! How can that be, you ask yourself.
A little background.
We have about an 85 yr old house with very old plaster walls. In some cases, the plaster can be difficult to repair. The folks who lived here before us for about 30 years obviously did not like repairing plaster. They put up butt ugly 70's style brown paneling on every surface they could get their hands on. We have been slowly taking the paneling down and repairing the walls as we have had the opportunity. I was amazed to see the lenghts of stupidity the previous owners went through to put up this paneling in the stairwell.

This is the hallway halfway through tearing it apart:

You'll notice the beautiful framework of wood that they nailed into the walls to keep the butt ugly 70's style paneling in good shape throughout the years. They also filled every crack with FOAM. Perhaps this was to achieve an insulating effect. I guess I'll find out this winter. You'll notice at the top of the picture the desire till make sure every crevice is filled with foam.

See exhibit #2:

This insane desire goes even further when they stack foam pieces Tetris style and wedge foam between the poorly cut pieces of wood. Just to make sure no crack goes unfoamed.
Yeah we need a law entitled "No Crack Unfoamed." Interpret that however you like.
Anyway. The Piece de Resistance...

I mean what the hell is that??!??! Lets take every piece of spare foam we have and spend hours painstakingly piece together a solid block of foam so that the guy who rips this crap apart can take pictures of it and mock it in a public forum.
NO CRACK UNFOAMED!!!
Ah well, I digress.
They actually were hiding something bigger with the paneling.

A big hole in the wall. I'm going to Lowe's tomorrow for some plaster hole fixing supplies.
Adios for now!

JJA - #1

2006-10-06T14:41:00.000-04:00

Jeremy Joins the Army. - Episode 1

I was the type of kid who like to do ... nothing. Really. My idea of the perfect day was lounging around doing nothing. If you consider playing computer games and dissecting small forest fauna nothing, then you'd get a pretty good idea of what I spent my time on. So, you can imagine everyone's surprise when I announced out of the blue that I was going to join the military. This was the summer between my Junior and Senior year of high school. Somehow, I was smart enough to know that I would not have done well in college right out of high school. And, since I despised doing anything that I did not want to do, as evidenced by my A in German and F in Calculus, I thought I would go to the place where I would learn how to do one that I wanted to do...learn a language. My sister's friend had joined the Army language corps a year or 2 prior to my decision. That is what gave me the idea of joining the Army to learn a language. Everyone that I told at school laughed at me because I could barely do 10 pushups, and I ran the mile in just under 12 minutes.

Next stop...the recruitment process.

Wbobth?

2006-10-05T17:35:00.000-04:00

My friends and I used to play with the Speak-n-Spell when we were but budding young lads. The newer Speak-n-Spells had an "encrypt" feature that took a word, then performed the unbreakable one for one letter substitution. My name encrypted was Wbobth. And thats what they called me. Play with the Speak-n-Spell here